Re:Forgotten
by Youtoberz
Summary: This is the story of Subaru's harshest reset thus far. Once Reinhard triumphed the Archbishop of Greed, Subaru checked around the city of Priestella to make sure everyone else was alright. After he got separated from Emilia, tragedy struck Subaru in the form of a small child wearing rags who spoke in the same voice as 'her'.
1. Return to Zero

**A/N: Bzzt! Bzzt! This fanfiction uses several elements from future arcs. I apologize, but this is mainly for light novel/web novel readers. I'll be using elements from arcs four, five, and six.**

* * *

_Return to Zero_

"You have to be shitting me," Subaru cursed under his breath as he clenched his fists.

Fate had been especially cruel to Subaru this day. Even though he was previously pitted against an Archbishop of the Witch's Cult, he was still able to come out of that predicament unscathed. It was thanks to what Subaru called the 'Reinhard button', but he was still proud of the fact that he was able to hold out until the Sword Saint's arrival.

"What a fortuitous day this is, ~tsu! To finally meet our hero."

But now Subaru had to face yet another Archbishop in the same day mere minutes after Reinhard disposed of Greed.

As the appearance of a warped child stood in front of him, Subaru grit his teeth. "'Hero'? There's already been a time where someone thought I was in league with you guys, so I'd appreciate it if you stopped singing my praises."

The Archbishop's tongue crept out of his wide smirk. "No, no, that won't do. After all, our feelings for you has nothing to do with your stink, ~tsu. You're the only person to blame for our pure and earnest feelings for you. Perhaps a repeat of our affection is in order." the Archbishop chuckled as saliva spewed everywhere.

In anticipation of the Archbishop's assault, Subaru clutched his chest with his hand to ready himself to counter. "Again, you're not making any sense. Are you sure you're not mixing me up with somebody else? One of your own already made that mistake with me."

Mimicking 'her' voice, the Archbishop continued, "There's no way that we're the ones in error. Just by looking at you, you're obviously our beloved Subaru-kun, ~tsu."

It felt as if Subaru had been punched in the gut as he stared wide-eyed at the Archbishop. "What… did you just say?" he asked slowly.

Licking his lips, the Archbishop asked sinisterly, "Tell me, ~tsu. Has big sister been well?"

His composure quickly crumbling, Subaru demanded with bloodlust, "Who the hell are you? Which sin are you?!"

"Have you truly forgotten about us? That is a shame, but it's fine. All that means is that we have to start from square one. No, from zero, ~tsu!" taunted the Archbishop, his lips curving into an impossible smile.

"GLUTTOOOOONY!" Subaru roared from the top of his lungs as he charged the Archbishop.

Despite developing a cool head after braving the horrors of this world for over the past year, Subaru abhorred Gluttony, perhaps even more than he despised Betelgeuse. Once the Archbishop mimicked his beloved, Subaru's rage won over his wits.

With his provocation bearing fruit, Gluttony lunged out towards Subaru. "Gotcha, ~tsu."

Once Gluttony was less than a meter in front of him, Subaru quickly realized his fatal mistake and clutched his chest. "Tch! Invisible Pro—"

But it was too late. Gluttony had already placed his hand atop Subaru's chest. As everything started to fade to black, Subaru heard the Archbishop's next words.

"Thanks for the meal, ~tsu."

…

"Despite it being natural that the common riffraff sleep on the floor, I once again ask that you wake up. You're dirtying the streets."

"Dorwazu!" Subaru let out a strange cry as he felt a sharp pain somewhere on his face. After he bolted up from the ground, Subaru quickly discovered blood trickling down from his nose. "Is that any way to wake somebody up?! If this happened to me back home, I would sue you for assault—" Subaru's protests finally died down once he laid eyes upon a woman wearing an extravagant red dress which caused a sigh to escape from his lips. "Oh, I should have known. I honestly don't know how Al is able to stand you."

To shield herself from the boy's repulsiveness, Priscilla protected her face with her fan as she berated him. "Is that any way to show gratitude towards someone who went out of her way to wake you? I realize you're a peasant, but perhaps I should force some manners into you." Recalling the name the boy spoke, Priscilla questioned, "Are you an acquaintance of my personal knight?"

Once he got back on his feet, Subaru spat back, "Hah? Don't play dumb. I know I leave too much of an impression to be forgotten, even by you."

Priscilla quickly lost interest in the boy as she turned away from him. "Regardless, I don't have time to chat with a commoner. Spare me from your unattractive sight and begone from here."

Not having the time to dispute with her, Subaru merely let out a sigh as he went the other way and turned into a nearby alley. Before allowing himself to vent, Subaru checked both ends of the alley to make sure nobody was around.

"Damn it all!" Subaru cursed as he punched the wall with every ounce of his strength. Pulling back his damaged hand, he admonished himself. "If Emilia-tan were here, she'd call me a dunderhead. Beako is going to heal me in the end, so I'm only causing her more problems this way. I really am a dunderhead..."

He pressed his forehead against the cold wall. As tears started to take shape in his eyes, Subaru lamented. "Damn it. God dammit! That was my chance to get Rem back, and I blew it. Gluttony was so close that I could wring the life out of him, but I lost my head."

As he ran his hands across his own body in an attempt to find any clues, Subaru wondered, "_What the hell did he do to me? Did he try taking my memories like he did with Crusch, or did he try to erase my existence like he did with…_"

"_Well, I'm not comatose and I clearly still remember who I am. I could see Betelgeuse's Unseen Hand, so maybe I have a way of fighting off Gluttony's authority_," Subaru concluded after seeing that nothing was visibly wrong with himself.

With a strong desire to face against the Archbishop once again, Subaru's hand subconsciously went for his knife. "_Maybe I should go back and… No, I have to see how things are with everyone. Maybe someone managed to capture or kill Gluttony._"

After he spent a full minute ruminating the idea of using Return by Death, Subaru reluctantly set aside the idea of turning back the clock for now. "I probably shouldn't get my hopes but, so I'll start by meeting up with Emilia-tan and Beako." Subaru muttered quietly to himself.

What followed was the most harrowing experience Subaru had ever experienced.

* * *

"Who are you?" Emilia questioned as she tilted her head to the side.

"...Huh?" Subaru gawked in response.

Drawing closer to Emilia's side stood a little girl with blonde hair that was swirled into drills. Through eyes that could be described as butterflies, she gazed at the boy. "Don't stare so foolishly at my contractor, I suppose. Also, as a person of the opposite sex, I won't allow you to get too close to Emilia."

Still baffled by their response, Subaru could only utter in response, "Beako...?"

"Who is this 'Beako' person, I wonder? I sincerely hope you're not referring to me," Beatrice questioned, her arms crossed over her chest.

In front of Subaru stood two of the most important people in his life with one of them being the person he wanted to marry, and yet they gazed at him as if he were a stranger. "Who else would I be talking about? D-Don't joke around!" Subaru desperately pleaded.

The conversation she had with an unfamiliar purple-haired knight fresh in her mind, Emilia delicately asked, "Umm... Excuse me, but you wouldn't happen to have been attacked by Gluttony too, have you?"

Emilia's question was like a punch in the gut for Subaru. Despite the answer being an obvious "yes", Subaru protested what the half-elf implied, "I… I was, but I still have my memories and I'm still awake. Whatever he was trying to do to me, I don't think it worked."

With her hand pressed against her chest, Emilia somberly replied, "But even though you seem to know me, I honestly have no idea who you are."

After he received another heavy blow to his crushed spirit, Subaru turned his gaze to the ground as he slowly asked, "You mean… like with Rem?"

"E-Eh? How do you know about her? I thought everyone besides Beatrice had forgotten her," Emilia nervously asked. She was surprised to hear that name spoken.

At the mention of that person's name, Beatrice narrowed her eyes on the boy and warned her contractor, "Emilia, this one is dangerous, in fact. The only people in the entire world who should know about the younger maid are those who I've told and those who belong to the Witch's Cult. Naturally, you can only belong to one of these categories, I suppose."

"Hold on a second! Are you accusing me of being in league with the Witch's Cult?!" Subaru snapped. Turning in desperation towards the half-elf, Subaru took a step closer to her as he rashly spoke, "Emilia! You believe me, ri—"

The next thing Subaru knew was that his world was spinning. Of course, he had experienced this sensation before, but never this violently. After being blasted off of his feet, his face made an intense impact with the concrete wall.

Even though the boy in front of her wailed in pain, Beatrice kept her palm aimed at him as she threatened the boy. "I already warned you not to step any closer to Emilia. If you make the same mistake again, you may end up losing your life, I suppose."

As Emilia continued to watch the boy writhe on the floor in agony, she noticed blood trickling from his head. Several seconds later, after the blood fountained down from the wound and dripped onto the floor from his chin, Emilia became petrified with her hand covering her mouth.

"Beatrice! You went too far! You should never hurt someone that badly because of mere suspicion!" scolded Emilia as she took a step closer to the injured boy.

Beatrice positioned her arm to prevent her contractor from going to his aid. "He'll live. More importantly, your top priority should be staying away from that man. Did you not hear my warning, I wonder?"

Once Subaru's pain died down to endurable levels, he heard someone speak to him. "That must have hurt quite a bit. I apologize for my inability to catch you in time."

Though he was still reeling from the pain, Subaru opened one of his eyes to find that familiar knight standing over him. "Reinhard…?"

Once he wrapped a bandage around the boy's head, Reinhard turned to the Great Spirit. "Miss Beatrice, allow me to apologize on this person's behalf if he has done anything to offend you. That being said, wounding him like this is going too far."

After she lowered her hand reluctantly, Beatrice justified herself. "Sword Saint, I have reason to believe this boy is conspiring with the Witch's Cult, I suppose."

In response to Beatrice's warning, Reinhard's eyes widened. "That's quite the assertion. Please forgive me for questioning the wisdom of a Great Spirit, but would you mind stating your reasons for believing such?" Reinhard inquired.

As she continued to scrutinize the boy, Beatrice informed Reinhard, "Like the cultists, that boy remembers those who have been erased from existence, I suppose."

Everyone forgetting about him had already ruined Subaru at his core, but to be labeled as a cultist by quite possibly the person he trusted the most sent him further into a spiraling rage.

Subaru had lost another part of himself. Perhaps it was the last sliver of his sanity or goodwill. "Like hell that's enough to accuse me! We already have a special case like you that still remembers Rem! Before all of this happened tonight, I was close to you! So naturally we've talked about Rem—! "Subaru vehemently defended himself.

Beatrice pinched her nose. "Adding to that, that boy has the stench of the Witch. Frankly speaking, I can't stand that ghastly odor for much longer, I suppose," Beatrice continued nasally, her whole face tensing up from the smell.

"The Witch's scent…" Subaru uttered who couldn't think of a retort.

"Understood. I'll take your accusation seriously then," Reinhard conceded to the Great Spirit. He helped the boy sit up straight against the damaged wall, then the Sword Saint started to question him. "Forgive me for suspecting you, but I would like to ask you some questions. First and foremost, are you aligned with the Witch's Cult?"

Still in a blind fury, Subaru shouted, "Of course I'm not! I want all those bastards dead even more than you guys do! They're the reason why you can't remember me! It's Gluttony's fault!"

With his gaze turning apologetic, Reinhard continued to press the boy. "It seems you're rather passionate about the matter. I further ask for your forgiveness, but I'm afraid I cannot dismiss Beatrice's warning just yet. If you wouldn't mind—"

"Don't bother, Reinhard. Interrogation doesn't suit you."

Once Reinhard turned around to face him, Felix added with a hollow voice, "Just leave that to me."

In response to the clear frustration on the fellow knight's face, Reinhard gently argued, "Felix, such a task shouldn't fall on your shoulders at this time. You might come to a rash conclusion."

After he bit lip as to repress something from coming out, Felix spoke in a chillingly quiet voice that betrayed his unrest, "After all the casualties we have suffered today, we don't have anything to show for it. If this man knows anything about the Witch's Cult, we have to pry it from him no matter what."

"Even so, it would poorly reflect our sense of justice if we take such action with little evidence. Forgive me for my discourtesy, Miss Beatrice," Reinhard countered as he looked to the Great Spirit apologetically.

Once he finally lost his calm facade, Felix snapped. "Stop getting in my way, Reinhard! If Beatrice says he's a part of the Witch's Cult, then that's good enough, right?!" Not bothering to appeal to the Sword Saint, Felix turned his attention to the cultist in question and demanded, "You! If you don't want to be considered an enemy to us all, you better prove it to me right now!"

Unable to remain quiet in the face of their distrust, Subaru smacked his fist against the pavement as she roared back, "Prove what?! Isn't it supposed to be 'innocent until proven guilty'?! How the hell do I prove it to you?! Was helping you guys defeat the White Whale and Betelgeuse not enough?!"

"I don't remember any of that!" Felix shouted back as he drew closer to the boy.

In response to Felix's hostility, Reinhard quickly rose to his feet. "Felix, calm down. It would only be natural not to remember such things if Gluttony really did attack him," Reinhard pleaded.

As Reinhard restrained Felix, Beatrice let out a sigh as she drew closer to the boy. "If you two are going to continue your petty squabble, then I'll be taking over, I suppose."

"Don't you dare kill him!" Felix roared, unable to wrestle himself out of Reinhard's grasp.

Uninterested in the rioting knight, Beatrice scoffed. "Do you take me for an imbecile? I would have already blown him to smithereens if he couldn't be useful to us, I suppose."

"Bea…trice…" Subaru painfully uttered.

As she glared down at the boy at her feet, Beatrice entertained his pleas. "If you claim to have been a part of our faction, what exactly was your position, I wonder?"

"I was… Emilia's knight," Subaru answered slowly.

Although she was momentarily stunned, Beatrice's lips eventually curved into an amused smirk. "Her knight, you say? Your jokes could use some work. While Garfiel is rather crude, he has proven himself quite capable. You're telling me that Emilia chose you, someone who's even lower than Otto, over the likes of Garfiel, I wonder?"

For the first time tonight, Subaru dryly chuckled. "Man, Otto can't catch a break, can he?"

Once she lost the smile on her face, Beatrice listed off her pieces of evidence. "There's no doubt in my mind that you are one of them. Adding to my previous points, it makes sense for you to try and get close to Emilia since she's an objective of the cultists. The way I see it, you're in cahoots with Gluttony by using the confusion his authority is causing to approach Emilia. You should just give up, I suppose."

Although his chances of remaining unscathed were slim, Subaru held onto the hope that he could find the words to turn everything around; however, the situation was truly unmendable at this point. "And I thought things couldn't get any worse knowing Gluttony got away. This really is a 'bad end'. "I'll just have to prove my innocence to you guys another time." Subaru gently smiled as he rose to his feet.

"What are you saying, I wonder?" Beatrice questioned cautiously as she aimed her hand at the boy.

"I'm saying goodbye," Subaru spoke, his voice turning hollow. It was time for Subaru to use his last resort. Using the remainder of his strength, Subaru quickly reached for his pocket knife. Once it was in his grasp, he thrust the blade towards his neck—

"Hrk!" Subaru let out a groan as he felt a sharp yet fleeting impact not to his throat, but to the back of his head. The next thing he knew was that his world had gone black.

* * *

…

"Ugh…" Subaru groaned out in pain. After he gazed around at his surroundings through his blurred vision, Subaru winced. "Where the hell am—"

"...This is bad," Subaru muttered gravely as he took in the white walls and metal bars that surrounded him.

"_This is bad. This is bad. This is bad. This is bad!" _Subaru mentally panicked. Realizing that he was in a jail cell, Subaru desperately shouted, "Crap, I have to go back now!"

Subaru realized he couldn't end himself in one blow after he noticed that his pocket knife was taken. The only alternative…

With Beatrice absent, Subaru understood that he wouldn't be obstructed this time around, so he prepared his teeth. "I'll have to chomp my tongue off again."

Right before he resolved himself to kill himself that way, Subaru had an alternative idea. "Wait, I can also…!"

"Invisible Providence!" Subaru exclaimed as the shadowy hand protruded from his chest. Forcing the hand to loop back around, Subaru extended it back into his chest until his heart was being lightly touched.

As he felt Invisible Providence caressing his heart, Subaru closed his eyes and forced the hand to close into a fist until his heart burst. It was a quick and relatively painless death.

…

Unfortunately, the first sight Subaru beheld was the same white walls. Even after Returning by Death, he found himself in the jail cell once more. He went back in time by only by a mere few seconds.

The strength in his legs quickly left him. "You… can't be serious. This has to be some kind of bad joke," Subaru uttered in denial as he collapsed to the floor.

Subaru was faced with a situation in which he had no hope of escape, nor could he go back to a time to fix his current predicament. Even with the power to rewind time, he was stuck.

_**BAD END.**_

* * *

Even as he was sinking into despair, Subaru pondered a way to escape his cell. The two scenarios he came up with was to either use his Invisible Providence to try to either forcefully break out or by snagging the keys from the guards. Despite his scheming, Subaru quickly abandoned those plans. If they figured out that he could use Sloth's authority, that would only worsen his position.

"Oh? It seems that you're finally awake."

A person's sudden voice snapped Subaru out of his fruitless brainstorming. "Julius," he emotionlessly spoke once he faced the familiar knight.

After a fleeting moment of weakness passed him, Julius took a deep breath before he spoke. "It seems that what Miss Beatrice said was true. You can remember those who aren't remembered by anyone else."

At first, Subaru was merely baffled by the fellow knight's statement; however, it slowly dawned upon him what Julius was implying. "What are you talking about? You're not another victim of Gluttony, are you? You're still awake, so everyone should still remember you. Do you have amnesia then?" Subaru questioned who was still in disbelief that a knight as powerful as Julius was bested by the Archbishop.

"No, thankfully my memories were not taken. It seems that I've caught something in between the afflictions grieving Lady Crusch and this 'Rem' person that Beatrice spoke of. I am a person who has been forgotten by the world, like Miss Rem, but I am also a person who kept his consciousness like Lady Crusch. In my particular case, my memories remained intact," Julius corrected while leaning his back against the wall.

"'Forgotten by the world', 'kept his consciousness', 'memories intact'," Subaru repeated with a glint in his eyes. "That's exactly what happened to me," Subaru realized once he pieced together the facts.

It was such a simple conclusion, and yet it took Subaru just now to realize it. That there could be a third set of symptoms involving Gluttony's authority.

After he crossed his arms over his chest, Julius accused the prisoner, "Don't think you can fool me into believing that we're the same. You only retain your memory of me because you're conspiring with Gluttony."

"You're wrong! That's not—! Why is everyone saying that?!" Subaru snapped as he succumbed to his unrest once again.

Julius was completely unfazed by the boy's emotional outburst, so he continued with the interrogation. "Tell me, where exactly is our logic flawed? As a Spiritualist, I have high regards for the opinion of Lady Beatrice, and she said you have the Witch's scent, a trait exclusive to the cultists."

"Just because I smell a particular way doesn't mean that I'm aligned with them! Where do you people get off on deciding all of these things just because I smell like the Witch?!" Subaru shouted. He took several seconds to catch his breath. "I bathe everyday just like the rest of you," he said in a more quiet, almost meek voice.

After he brushed off the prisoner's assertions, Julius revealed the most damning piece of evidence. "Even I wouldn't accuse you just because someone prestigious says it, but I must ask of you, what was the purpose of drawing your knife?" Subaru's eyes widened in shock as he was reminded of that mistake. "No, you're wrong! I wasn't trying to hurt anyone!" Subaru pleaded desperately, fearing he was misunderstood.

"For once, we've come to an agreement, but Reinhard informed me that you pointed that knife towards yourself as if you were about to commit suicide. Thankfully, he managed to knock you out before that could happen," Julius explained.

"…"

When the captive finally quieted down, Julius attempted to rationalize his suicide attempt. "The conclusion we've drawn from that is you were trying to silence yourself. I doubt any of the Archbishops are self-sacrificing to the point where they would dispose of themselves to prevent any leaks of information, so you must be the likes of a lowly henchmen. Or perhaps you are comparable to the 'fingers' the Archbishop of Sloth used."

"…You're wrong," Subaru weakly murmured. It was all just another colossal misunderstanding. Of course, Subaru knew that he made some rash decisions, but even so, he truly believed that the fault goes to everyone who recklessly branded him a cultist. So what if he smelled like the Witch? So what if he remembered Rem? So what if it tried to kill himself?! What do they know?!

"What the hell do you know about me anyways?!" Subaru shouted using the culmination of all his feelings.

It seemed like the captive glared at him without pause for a whole minute before he slowly turned away. Julius took that as his resignation. "Regardless of what you say, you've already been branded a member of the Witch's Cult. Naturally, there will be no trial for you. If you would accept your fate and divulge your secrets to us that would lessen the burden on everyone, including you. Your death could be swift."

That wasn't an option for Subaru who had no choice but to hold on tightly to his beliefs. "Sorry, but if I let you kill me now, I'll only get myself stuck in an infinite loop. I have to last until at least Gluttony's authority comes undone so you all can remember me."

"If Reinhard were present, I'm sure he would urge for your torture to be postponed until Gluttony's authority comes undone. Much to Felix's relief, Reinhard isn't here." Julius sighed in response.

In anticipation of what's to come, Subaru shuddered as he let out a dry chuckle. "I've got some rough days ahead, huh."

"Which is why I said it would lessen your burden too," Julius continued to urge. Forgotten from the world and with the Witch's Cult to blame, Julius desired any kind of advantage over the Archbishop of Gluttony. If it meant he had to grant mercy to a cultist, then it was a small price to pay for information.

His lips formed a shaky grin, Subaru said, "Sorry, but I'm sticking to my innocence. I don't know anything about the Witch's Cult that you all don't already know."

Once again coming to an impasse with the captive, Julius decided to ask one more question. "Then you leave us little choice. Tell me your name, at least."

Having decided to withhold as much as possible, Subaru retorted, "My name's honestly not all that important. As I am now, I'm just a self-proclaimed knight. Kinda like you, I bet."

After his expression flared up momentarily, Julius shrugged his unrest off as he made his exit. "I'm used to such uncouth words, but I must admit you have a gift for making me lose my composure. I've given you my warning, so I'll be on my way now."

Julius opened the door to leave, but Subaru still had one last question he wanted answered. "Hey, I have to ask you something. How is Joshua doing? Did he believe you when you told him you were his older brother?"

Before he closed the door to leave, Julius remained calm this time as he blankly asked, "Who is Joshua?"

"...You have to be shitting me," Subaru cursed as his face lit up with disgust.

In the end, Julius completely dismissed Subaru's words as an attempt to further agitate him and closed the door without another word.

Despite Subaru's acclimation to pain, the next several weeks were a hell that Subaru couldn't have possibly prepared himself for.

It started with torture comparable to the pain Rem put him through in the loop where she cut of his leg and beat him with her chains. Despite the white walls around him getting stained red with his blood, Subaru would later wish to return to such simpler times.

As his cries of agony grew quieter, the usual torturers stopped making their appearance for a single knight took their place.

"Greetings. I hope you enjoyed your little warm up. Things are going to be much rougher from here on out, so I hope you can endure it before your mind gives out," Felix spoke with venom dripping from his voice

Broken on the floor, Subaru couldn't even move as he groaned in pain. "'Warmup'? The guys from yesterday said they were going to give me a nice and relaxing back massage and they ended up breaking my back. As someone who calls it quits for the day if he stubs his toe in the morning, I have to say that I'm definitely going to crack if you pressure me too hard."

Felix's lips curved into a sinister grin as he placed his hand on the captive and replied, "I suppose I'll have to keep that in mind then."

Right as Subaru felt something touch his shoulder, he was immediately assaulted by a wave of agony. "GYAAAAA!" Subaru immediately screamed out. How could he have forgotten? His body was possessed by Betelgeuse at the time, but Subaru definitely remembers this sensation. The feeling of his body fighting against him from the inside.

"Tell me how to cure Lady Crusch, and while you're at it, spill everything you know about Lust," Felix coldly demanded as he gave the captive a brief moment of reprieve for him to answer.

Of course, Subaru didn't know the answer to such things. Although Subaru managed to maintain a strong front until now, that quickly crumbled as he discovered a new level of misery. Before he was driven to madness, Subaru's final thought was that he probably wouldn't be able to call Felix a friend by the time this was all over with.

* * *

"We… We did it!" Emilia cheered as she thrust her arms into the air in celebration.

The accomplishment in question was the slaying of Gluttony in their entirety. Roughly one month ago, Emilia and her group set out for The Watchtower to find a method for undoing Gluttony's authority, but in a stroke of incredible luck, Gluttony made their appearance. While several problems arose from this, Reinhard's absurd battle power secured this victory.

"Rem… I remember my little sister," Ram breathlessly spoke. As an overpowering feeling took over, Ram bolted away from the group as she screamed, "I have to go to her now!"

"Ah, Ram, slow down, I suppose!" Beatrice warned as she and Emilia chased after her.

Once everyone save himself and one other person departed the room, Reinhard turned his attention towards the Sage and bowed to her. "Even if you haven't spoken a word to us, you have my thanks for your hospitality."

"It was nothing," the Sage sighed as she brushed off the Sword Saint's gratitude.

Until now, the Sage hadn't spoken a single word to any of them. If fact, the Sage treated them as if they didn't exist, so to hear her suddenly talk surprised the Sword Saint. "Oh, so you do understand me. I must confess that I thought a language barrier was separating us. If you don't mind my question, were you the one who attacked us out in the sand dunes?" Reinhard smiled from relief.

"Yep, sure was. I had very specific instructions to not let anyone near this Watchtower," the Sage nonchalantly replied as she gazed nonchalantly down at the sand dunes below.

In preparation for the worst, Reinhard moved his hand to the hilt of his blade as he cautiously spoke, "If so, I must ask of your intentions once we leave this watchtower."

The Sage didn't even bother to turn around to face the world's strongest knight as he reached for his weapon. "I'm only supposed to prevent anyone from entering. I was never given orders about what to do once people actually enter the tower or if they decide to leave," The Sage informed the knight.

As the tension dissipated, Reinhard placed his sword-hand behind his head and smiled. "Ah, that's truly a relief. Thank you for giving me peace of mind. It must be lonely to reside in this tower all by yourself. I apologize for dispatching the one other person residing here, but he granted me little choice."

In response to the Sword' Saint's apology, the Sage stuck out her tongue in disgust. "Bleh. It's not like I'll miss that guy. You actually did me a favor by killing him since he was going to break the rules."

Although he was startled by the Sage's reply, Reinhard's smile persevered as he spoke his goodbye to her. "It seems this is where we part ways. Farewell, Sage of the Watchtower. I sincerely pray that you encounter the person you're waiting for."

Despite being indifferent to the knight, the Sage finally turned around to question him; however, he was gone. "How did he know that I was waiting for someone? Oh, I was probably giving off that 'princess waiting for her prince' vibe that master talked about," the Sage wondered aloud.

As she gazed out longingly towards her star, the Sage whispered to herself, "Master…"

Back with Reinhard, the knight went to meet up with the others in the Green Room. Once there, he was met with a sight that moved his heart.

The twin sisters embraced each other as tears raced down their faces while they sobbed out each other's names. Emilia wrapped her arms around the two sisters and joined them in their hugging. While Anastasia's seemed to be smiling, the expression on her face seemed somewhat troubled. Lastly, Beatrice stood several feet away from the three crying girls with tears of her own racing down her cheeks.

At first, Reinhard was truly relieved by the heartwarming reunion between sisters; however, even more so than Anastasia, the Sword Saint couldn't help but feel troubled by the look upon Beatrice's face. "Forgive me if I'm wrong, Miss Beatrice, but does something ail you?" he asked.

Once she heard Reinhard's question, Emilia turned towards her spirit and worriedly asked, "Beatrice, what's wrong? Do you want to come hug Rem too? It must've been hard to be the only one to remember her until now."

It didn't take long for the Great Spirit to collapse to the ground. With her hands pressed against the cold floor, Beatrice gazed blankly ahead of her as she uttered in despair, "What… What have I done, I wonder?"

As tears raced down the Great Spirit's face, Anastasia's smile dissolved as she stared forlornly at the floor. "I reckon I know why Beatrice is makin' such a face. It seems we've left behind some important people." Biting into her lip, Anastasia whispered to herself, "I'm so sorry, Julius, Joshua."

Troubled by the two girls' distress, Reinhard questioned with a hint of desperation in his voice, "For you two to make such faces, please tell me, did we somehow make an error? I simply don't under—" In the middle of his questioning, Reinhard came to a complete stop as his eyes widened in shock. His hand pressed to his tense face, the Sword Saint grit his teeth as he murmured, "This… can't be."

With yet another person afflicted by anguish, Emilia looked around at the three and anxiously asked, "W-Why do you guys look so upset? Didn't we win?"

"Lady Emilia," Rem spoke once she broke free of her sobbing. As the perplexed half-elf turned to face her, Rem hesitantly asked, "Where is Subaru? Why isn't he with you?"

"Suba—?" Emilia blurted out as if she didn't recognize his name, but just upon hearing it caused her to finally remember him.

She remembered the boy that she left behind.

Still in denial, Emilia looked over to Beatrice as if seeking confirmation; however, all she found was the sight of a little girl sobbing on the floor.

With tears starting to build up in her eyes, Emilia uttered in bafflement, "We… forgot him."

"'Forgot him'?" Rem uttered, baffled by the half-elf's explanation and by the dreadful expressions of those around her. To hear such a thing about her darling Subaru, Rem's confusion quickly turned into anger as she shouted, "What is that supposed to mean?! How do you forget someone as audacious and as wonderful as Subaru?! You're not making any sense!"

Once she finally pried her face from her little sister's shoulder, Ram explained through her tear-stained face, "Rem, Gluttony's authority can erase a person's existence from the world. I didn't even know who you were until Beatrice— No, until Barusu explained it to me."

Unable to process what her big sister was saying, Rem blankly replied, "Huh?"

After she triumphed over her hesitation, Ram looked to Emilia and Beatrice and asked, "That man you two met in the capital. The one you said was part of the Witch's Cult. You were talking about Barusu, weren't you?"

Her face pressed to the floor in remorse, Beatrice sobbed out, "I-I'm…! I'm so sorry, I suppose!"

"Big sister…?" Rem looked to Ram for any kind of explanation, but all she received was her apologetic gaze.

In a rare display of genuine remorse, Ram brought her sister close once again. "Forgive us, Rem. We branded your hero a traitor. I have doubts about whether we'll receive a warm welcome from him," Ram weakly apologized.

Anastasia was tempted to join in on the self-deprecation; however, she realized that Julius was waiting for her return. "We can stand in a circle an' blame ourselves until the sun goes down but that won't solve anythin'. We gotta go back and face the people we've left behind," Anastasia urged the group.

Despite the fact that her own face was wet with tears, Emilia focused her attention on her... No, on Subaru's contracted spirit as she placed her hand on her back. "Beatrice, please get up. We have to get Subaru out of that place. H-He's probably still locked up," Emilia weakly spoke.

Once she finally lifted her snot-filled face up from the floor, Beatrice fearfully choked out, "I… I don't know how I can face him. He was my precious Subaru, and I lashed out at him and condemned him. W-What if he's come to hate me, I wonder?"

In the end, Emilia couldn't find the words to comfort Beatrice because she harbored the same fears.

* * *

**Author's Notes: Howdy, folks. It's me again.**

**This is definitely an experimental work since I'll be diving pretty deep into the lore of Re:Zero. Hopefully I don't butcher everything. Oh, and sorry about glossing over arc 6. It would take forever to give my own take on the arc, and quite frankly, it's not what I'm interested in this fic since I'm mainly interested in the repercussions of forgetting and being forgotten.**

**I didn't take a break from writing for long. I thought I was going to be gone for at least half a year, but then my mind demanded more Beako, and by extension, more Re:Zero. This is actually a scraped idea for A Beako Story that I never wrote about because it was too spoilery.**

**The wait for Re:Zero is honestly killing me. It's been eight months since the S2 announcement and we haven't gotten anything since. I was like 70% sure that we would get more information with the most recent OVA, but alas, we got duped. Back into Re:Zero hibernation for me. I'm honestly worried S2 won't come out in 2020 (don't think I've heard anything officially stating it's coming out next year).**

**Sorry about Felt not making an appearance. I originally included her among those who went to the watchtower since Reinhard went, but it was hard to give her any spotlight since she was hardly affected by Gluttony's authority. I mean, she's cool with Subaru, but she wasn't there to condemn him like everyone else.**

**So, information regarding this fanfiction. It's (probably) going to be three chapters in total. Also, the theme for this fanfic will be reconciliation, as you've probably guessed. I won't be delving into Re:Zero lore much more than I already have in this chapter. From here the plot will mainly revolve around Subaru licking his own wounds and him restoring what was lost. I'm not going to throw any crazy stuff in here like trying to guess what arc 7 will be about.**

**Well, that about does it for now. See you in the next one.**

**Buh bye.**

* * *

**Other butt les import-ant persons' note (E/N): Sup. I baet teh writr b0i Ovre heed dis thyme, pleaz review; Renember to keep it constructive, and not destructive frens. fEEl FrEe too inzult me tho. [bonus points to anyone who can correct this]**

**This story is fittin to get real interesting, so I hope yall stick around. 3 have a wonderful day/night. I bid you adieu. :)**


	2. Re:union

_Re:union_

As Emilia's group journeyed back to Lugnica to drop off the Sword Saint, everyone took turns to explain to Rem the various events that had transpired with the Archbishop of Gluttony.

"So, the victims of Gluttony either have their memories taken or their existence is erased from the world, leaving them comatose like I was." Rem surmised everyone's collective explanations. As she slowly came to terms with all of the time stolen from her, she shuddered, "How awful. I can't believe I missed a precious year of Subaru's life."

As Emilia's and Beatrice's expressions started to stiffen upon hearing his name spoken, Rem turned towards her sister and slowly asked "Big sister… You said that everyone forgot about Subaru, right? Was he another victim of Gluttony like I was, except he kept his consciousness?"

"The same thing happened to my knight, Julius." Anastasia broke her silence. Once Rem turned to look at her, Anastasia somberly continued "Even though Julius approached me that day and worried about my wellbeing, I honestly didn't know who he was. It seemed that he was quite disciplined in the ways of knighthood, so they decided that he was a unique case. Even though Julius was accepted back into the knights, Subaru…"

Rem's hands clutched at the hem of her dress in an attempt to restrain her frustration as she asked with anger dripping from her voice, "Subaru was charged with being aligned with the Witch's Cult, but why? Why him?"

With a guilty conscious, Reinhard spoke up, "It was a mistake on my part, Miss Rem. You see—"

"It was my fault, I suppose." Beatrice interrupted. It was presumptuous for anyone else to shoulder her blame. It was an insult to her sin. After she took a deep breath, Beatrice continued, "I… I honestly thought he was a cultist for sure, I suppose."

Since Beatrice monopolized the blame, Rem glared at the Great Spirit and demanded, "But why did you come to such a conclusion? I thought you were too patient to make such a rash mistake."

Although Emilia had offered Beatrice her hand, the Great Spirit rejected it for there was only one person's hand she longed for. Finally able to differentiate between her fake experiences and the authentic ones, Beatrice explained, "I realize now that this is nothing more than a fake memory, but Bubby asked me to be Emilia's contractor and to protect her from the Witch's Cult. If I even suspected someone of being a part of that cult, I had to take it as a certainty to protect Emilia… I'm sorry, I suppose."

After she endured another fruitless apology from the Great Spirit, Rem felt a flash of anger as she continued to interrogate her, "What are you doing outside of the Forbidden Archives?"

"Subaru, he… He took my hand and brought me out into the world. Subaru is my… He was my contractor, I suppose." Beatrice painfully explained as she gazed longingly at her empty palms.

Despite the Great Spirit's rejection, Emilia wrapped her arm around her shoulder and spoke for her, "Beatrice was supposed to be contracted to Subaru all this time, but after he was attacked by Gluttony… The next thing I knew is that I had been Beatrice's contractor for about a year."

As she sat right next to her little sister, Ram added "Lady Beatrice was perhaps the closest person to Barusu. It's hard to watch, but she is nothing without him."

Once Rem had finally realized that the reason for Beatrice's radical change in personality was because of her overpowering guilt, she sympathized with the Great Spirit. After all, she too had once thought Subaru could be connected to the Witch's Cult. From time to time, she wondered if she would've taken a reckless action against Subaru if things happened differently back when they first met. That thought always made her heart ache.

With her tense face finally starting to lax, Rem's glare turned into a gentle gaze as she apologized, "Lady Beatrice, I'm sorry for lashing out at you. Please forgive—"

"Don't say that!" Beatrice exclaimed as her forlorn expression was replaced by a look of fright. It was as if Beatrice was terrified of being excused for her actions. As she hugged her knees, Beatrice spoke in a feeble voice, "Don't say that, I suppose. Everything you have said was nothing but the entire truth. Don't deny your claims when they are indeed fact. The one who should be begging for forgiveness is solely myself, I suppose."

Once again trying to take responsibility, Reinhard spoke with his usual honesty, "No, the fault lies entirely with me. It's because I did an insufficient job at handling the situation. I should have heard Subaru out rather than leave it to you and Felix."

Unable to restrain her unrest any longer, Ram spoke up, "If you all want to continue talking about blame, then shouldn't the fault go to Barusu for having his name eaten in the first place?"

"Ram—!"

Not even bothering to address Emilia's shout, Ram continued her explanation "'If only I did this, Barusu wouldn't have suffered'. If we continue that logic further down, then none of us would have suffered if he was competent enough to handle Gluttony at the time."

As she received a painful look from her little sister, Ram sighed, "Perhaps I went too far. Still, I wish you would show me some consideration. I've just been reunited with my lovely sister and all I hear are these pitiful claims to blame from you all. If Barusu were here, do you honestly think he would want to hear it?"

Although she had been unsettled by the maid's previous words, Emilia came to her own conclusion, "Yeah, I think I get what Ram is trying to say. Instead of getting caught up in what already happened, we should focus of how we can make it up to him."

With the atmosphere still tense, Ram offered the half-elf some advice, "Since you've elegantly interpreted my words, allow me to give you a suggestion. I'm sure Barusu will quickly come around if you plant a kiss upon his lips, Lady Emilia."

Instead of a furious blush appearing on her cheeks, Emilia wore a look of genuine surprise as she innocently asked, "E-Eh? You really think that will help cheer Subaru up?"

Without feeling a shred of shame, Rem raised up her hand and passionately offered, "If it's a matter of kissing Subaru on the lips, you should leave that to Rem!"

Already expecting her little sister's foolishness, Ram quickly denied her, "I expressly forbid it."

"Stop messing around, I suppose!" Beatrice snapped as she stood up from the carriage floor. Unable to forgive such a whimsical conclusion, the Great Spirit lashed out, "Acting as if Subaru were a princess whose problems could be solved with a simple smooch. Don't you realize how unreasonable that is, I wonder?!"

Once the Great Spirit's rant came to an end, Ram heavily sighed, "It seems you've completely squandered my attempt at lightening the mood."

As the anger that violently swirled within her chest quickly dissipated, Beatrice uttered in bafflement, "Y-You mean, it was a joke, I wonder?"

The tense atmosphere in the carriage continued to persist due to Beatrice's conflicted heart. As guilt continued to take hold of Beatrice, she shakily spoke "I-I'm—"

Unable to bear another apology from the Great Spirit's lips, Ram interrupted, "Beatrice, as it stands, the value of your apologies are completely worthless. It's a waste of oxygen for you to continue to express your regrets. It's also a betrayal of yourself to appear so pitiful."

As Beatrice simply gawked at her in speechlessness, Ram continued to press her, "I'm sure you're going to sob and apologize your heart out when you reunite with Barusu, but for his sake, I hope you have more to offer him than just 'I'm sorry'."

* * *

"Subaru."

"Mmm." Subaru weakly groaned from the floor.

"Subaru Natsuki."

His full name being spoken caused Subaru to forcefully open his eyes. "I never did tell you my name." Subaru muttered, and once he looked up to see the purple-haired knight standing in front of the cell door, he cautiously asked, "Does that mean it's all over, Julius?"

Julius gazed remorsefully at the person in front of him as he slowly spoke, "Subaru… Words can't express…"

"I need to hear it. Do you remember me, Julius?" Subaru interrupted. He needed to know that his personal hell had finally come to its conclusion.

In the same guilt-ridden tone, Julius answered, "Yes, I remember you now, Subaru. It shames me to no end that I've forgotten a dear friend."

After a faint chuckle, Subaru sat up from the floor and spat in jest, "'A dear friend'? That sounds pretty sarcastic coming from you."

"_What a load of bullshit."_

Careful to make sure his thoughts weren't reflected in his words or actions, Subaru maintained a smile as he requested, "Anyways, you should know that I'm completely innocent, right? Would you do me a favor and get me out of here? I'll go crazy if I have to spend another day in here."

"_Assuming there's any sanity left in me."_

"Of course." Julius quickly accepted as he unlocked the cell door. As Subaru slowly got to his feet, Julius offered his hand to him, "Allow me to assist you."

Although the simple process of standing up was arduous task, Subaru declined the help, "No thanks, I'm good."

"_You think I want your help after all of this?_"

Once Subaru finally managed to stand on his own two feet, Julius remarked with amazement, "I'm surprised that you're able to stand on your own."

After he caught his breath, Subaru nonchalantly explained, "All the damage I've taken until now has been healed, so it was more of a question of if I had any strength left to move, and I guess this answers that question."

"_I feel like I'm about to fall over any second._"

Before another pointless apology emerged from his lips, Julius instead suggested, "If energy is still a concern, might I recommend we go get breakfast? I… imagine you haven't been fed well these past few weeks."

Despite being fully aware of the emptiness in his own stomach, Subaru steered away from Julius's recommendation, "I was actually thinking about walking around town and seeing the sights. You know, enjoy the smaller things in life that I haven't been able to indulge myself in recently."

"_Leave me the hell alone already."_

Concerned about Subaru's physical condition, Julius offered, "Then I'll accompany you on your walk."

"Julius." Subaru coldly spoke. Although he was afraid of letting something slip, Subaru spoke the truth, "I need time alone, time away from all of these painful things. If you feel any remorse for me whatsoever, can you respect this one small favor that I'm asking of you?"

"_Take a hint, asshole. I don't want you near me."_

Taken aback by the harsh tone in Subaru's voice, Julius reluctantly consented, "Forgive me for pestering you. I have no intention of burdening you any more than I already have, so if that's truly what you want, I shall give you some space. I had plans on meeting up with my brother and setting out for Lugnica at once, but perhaps I should wait for you to be ready?"

Still trying to maintain his façade, Subaru sheepishly smiled, "Don't worry about me. After everything I've been through, I planned on giving myself a little vacation to get away from it all, and Priestella seems like a good enough place for that."

"_If I travel with you to Lugnica, I'll just run into __**them**__ sooner._"

In one last attempt to give his friend a helping-hand, Julius solemnly asked, "Is there anything that I can say, no, anything I could do for you to make amends?"

With his hand pressed against his forehead as if to relieve the pain, Subaru sighed, "I've got a massive headache right now, so I'm pretty sure I would just end up forgetting what you would say. If you want to give me something, I wouldn't mind a donation."

"_Pretty sure all my valuables besides the clothes on my back are long gone."_

After he took a handful of coins out from his pouch, Julius carefully laid them in Subaru's hand and advised, "It's merely pocket coins, but take this to eat and find a place to stay at night."

Once he noticed that several sacred gold coins had fallen into his hand, Subaru hissed, "'Pocket coins', my ass. If this were in yen, I'd be able to buy a whole gaming console."

"_Rich bastard. You seem to have done pretty well for yourself for being forgotten about too."_

Although dissatisfied that he couldn't do more for Subaru, Julius turned away from his friend and spoke, "With this, I'll start to respect your request straight away. I'll postpone my departure until tomorrow in case you change your mind. If you need anything else, don't hesitate to come to me."

Thankful that he didn't need to see his face any longer, Subaru felt his face contorting as he spoke, "Don't sound so hospitable with me. Even if it's in line with your character, it sounds fake when I'm the one receiving it."

Having one final thing to say, Julius said his farewell, "Then, until next time."

"Yeah, see you then." Subaru answered back in a hollow voice.

"_Good riddance."_

"Good riddance." Subaru hissed as his thoughts finally caught up with his words. When his name was eaten by Gluttony, Subaru made the fatal mistake of letting his true emotions show, and that led everyone to distrust him. Thus, Subaru resolved himself to maintain a façade until his freedom was assured, and it worked. Had Subaru verbally lashed out, Julius would probably deem Subaru too mentally unstable to go unsupervised.

Currently, Subaru only had three simple wants: to repress all of the things that would hurt him, to walk the streets uninhibited, and to eat a decent meal. Julius, like everyone else he knew in this world, had betrayed him, so he needed to distance himself from him.

With his first want achieved with relative ease, Subaru decided to move on to his second want as he tried to step out of his jail cell; however, he stumbled due to his weakened state.

In all honesty, Subaru wasn't surprised as he could barely stand up to begin with. As he quickly collapsed to the floor, Subaru closed his eyes and berated himself "_Really, me? Even after all this time, I still can't do a single thing by myself?"_

Despite bracing himself for the impact against the hard floor, the impact never happened. After several seconds went by in confusion, Subaru opened his eyes and discovered a startling sight.

"Invisible… Providence?" Subaru uttered as found out that the shadowy hand had protruded out from his gut. As it turns out, the shadowy hand had caught his fall as it pressed itself against the floor.

Outside of gripping his heart, that hand had only ever come out at Subaru's request, and adding to that, Subaru always felt like he sacrificed a little bit of himself each time to use Invisible Providence, and yet this time it came out on its free will. What was even more startling was the fact that Subaru felt no repercussions from Invisible Providence being triggered.

Despite the miraculous development, Subaru gravely thought "_This… probably isn't a good sign._"

Once Subaru regained his footing, the shadowy hand crept back into his chest. After taking a long inhale and exhale, Subaru slowly reattempted his first step and found success, so he took his second step, and then his fourth step, and then…

"Huh? Where the hell am I?" Subaru questioned once he took in his surroundings. It started with him walking out of his cell, and the next thing he knew he was in the middle of a crowded street with stalls and vendors. Once he recognized he was still in Priestella, Subaru concluded, "Ah, right. I'm outside. I was so focused on walking that I didn't even realize where I was going."

Subaru had developed a severe case of absentmindedness in the past month. Humans can naturally multitask in their everyday life, but Subaru had to focus all of his attention just in the simple action of walking without having the luxury of forming a single thought in between his steps.

Blinded by the setting sun, Subaru shielded his eyes as he remembered the emptiness of his stomach, "Julius just said something about getting breakfast, so why is the sun setting? Now that I think about it, I'm pretty hungry."

As he eyed a nearby food stall, Subaru muttered "I wonder…"

Now that his legs had regained some of their previous strength through use, Subaru casually walked by the stall as he whispered, "Invisible Providence."

With incredible ease, the shadowy hand extended out of his chest and quickly picked an appa off of the cart, plopping it into Subaru's hand.

After he cautiously observed his surroundings, Subaru affirmed that nobody witnessed the theft. What's more, the use of Invisible Providence didn't take a toll on Subaru, just like earlier.

"Hehe." Subaru faintly chuckled as he clutched the appa. Earlier that same day, Subaru had his misgivings about Invisible Providence's ease of use, but now he was enthralled by it. The boy was finally granted a power that didn't come with a disappointing cost, or perhaps, that cost had already been paid.

_And if the cost had already been paid, then what was stopping him from using it uninhibitedly?_

"Hehehe." Subaru continued to snicker to himself as he pulled out the coins Julius had lent him and tossed them into the street, "_I only accepted it because I didn't have anything, but now that it's come to this, I don't need your charity, Juli."_

As beggars and nobles alike clamored for the coins he had thrown away, Subaru finished his first fulfilling meal in over a month before he once again zoned out and let his legs guide him whenever they will.

"Help me!"

"Hmm?" Subaru snapped out his trance as he found an all-too-familiar situation. There were three men that looked very similar to those who Subaru considered his first obstacle in this world harassing a woman.

Despite the woman's desperate pleas, Subaru was surprised by how little he felt as he half-heartedly agreed, "Sure, I'll give you a hand."

"Huh? You don' look so tough. You think you can take on the three of us?" One of the thugs threatened.

Taking the thug's words lightly, Subaru shot back, "From where I'm from, that's usually what level one thugs say before they get their asses handed to them. I swear people in this world need to stop triggering such obvious flags."

"What the hell are ya talkin' about?!" Another thug shouted as he brandished a knife.

In an attempt to intimidate the thugs, Subaru reluctantly declared, "I'm saying that I am the half-elf's knight, Subaru Natsuki."

It wasn't a title Subaru intended to uphold, but if using it made his life even a little bit easier, he would declare it without a care.

"You mean you're that Lolimancer guy? Nice try, but you don't look anything like the descriptions." One of the thugs snickered.

"I see that reputation still precedes me." Subaru sighed, and as he shifted gears, he decided to take direct action, "Okay, let's try this then. Invisible Providence."

At Subaru's command, a shadowy hand protruded out of his chest. Just like before, Subaru felt no repercussions and the hand could extend much further out than before.

The difference in power between himself and _Sloth_ was starting to diminish.

Once the shadowy hand grabbed one of the thugs by the neck and suspended him in the air, Subaru howled with laughter by the ease of the task, "Hahahahaha!"

As the remaining two thugs watched with horror, one of the thugs yelped, "L-Let's get out of here!"

Right before Subaru could react to the two fleeing thugs, he heard a violent snapping sound. Once he looked at his captive to find him completely unresponsive, he scratched the side of his head and nonchalantly wondered, "Oops. Did I go too far?"

Once the thug's corpse collapsed to the ground, the terrified woman shakily spoke up, "H-He's dead. You… You killed him."

In response to the blatant murder of his own doing, Subaru felt such a serene calm that you might think he was in a trance as he replied, "It's not that big of a deal. I mean, he only died once, right? It could've been a lot worse."

At Subaru's words, the woman finally gave into her fright as she screamed and ran away. Sheepishly scratching his cheek, Subaru frowned, "Huh? Did I mess something up?"

Not even bothering to look at the corpse he deprived of life, Subaru turned around as he recounted his first meeting with the half-elf, "Actually, I can kind of understand why she ran away like that. After I was saved by Emilia, I ended up dying a lot just to try to return the favor. Back then, if I ran away just like the girl did, maybe I would be living a peaceful life."

As he felt his heart being tugged, Subaru pressed a hand to his chest as he longingly wondered, "Is it still possible for someone like me? To live a simple, ordinary, quiet life?"

After that night, Subaru decided to lay low. If he continued to flaunt his power, he would surely become notorious and the nightmare from before would no doubt repeat itself, especially if it were discovered that he was using an Authority. Subaru continued his simple existence by casually taking food and other necessities by using Invisible Providence. Although it was a basic, _slothful_ lifestyle, Subaru flourished under it compared to his previous harsh treatment.

"Subaru."

But that simple, everyday lifestyle was about to come to an end once _she_ called his name.

* * *

"Is that you, Subaru?"

Upon being called, Subaru turned his gaze up at _her._ He thought he was prepared to lash out at anyone from his past who had caused him pain, but he had somehow forgotten.

He had forgotten that Gluttony didn't curse only him.

"Rem…" Subaru uttered so quietly that no one could hear him. The walls that he had built around his heart had started to crumble.

There stood the blue-haired maid in all of her beauty, and yet the conflicted look upon her face seemed to suggest that she was baffled by his sight.

"Is it really you, Subaru?" Rem repeated with desperation in her voice.

In response to her question, Subaru simply gawked in silence as he wondered "_Shouldn't… Shouldn't the answer be obvious?"_

Although he felt that his soul could be saved if he accepted Rem, Subaru instead felt his instincts crying out to run away. As his gaze slowly fell back down to the ground, Subaru hugged his knees as if to protect himself and uttered, "You have the wrong person."

Even though she hesitated when she saw his face, Rem instantly recognized his voice.

"Subaru…" Rem spoke his name with such tender affection. As she knelt to the ground, she reached out to touch his hair as she asked with heartbreak in her voice, "What happened to you?"

"Stay away from me!" Subaru yelped as he retreated from the approaching hand. Although he succeeded to distance himself by a few feet, his back was pressed against the wall behind him.

Although startled by his desperate action, Rem gently eased him, "Subaru, it's okay. I'm not here to hurt you. You know that your Rem is always on your side, right?"

As he groped the wall behind him in desperation, Subaru continued to scream, "Just stay away! I don't even know who the hell you are! Who's Rem supposed to be?!"

"Subaru!"

With his name called by somebody else, Subaru felt his entire body quake in fear once he recognized the owner's voice, "Beatrice…"

As he turned to see the little girl sprinting towards him, Subaru started to lose control of his breathing as he clawed into the wall with his fingernails.

In an attempt to deescalate the situation, Rem pleaded with the spirit, "Lady Beatrice, please stay back! Subaru is frightened!"

Although she had stopped in her tracks only a few feet away from Subaru, Beatrice vehemently protested, "But Subaru is right before my eyes, I suppose! I'm his partner, so how can you ask me to stay away from him, I wonder?!"

With Beatrice's desperation being clear on her face, Rem continued to urge, "Please display the patience that you are known for."

"'P-Patience'." Subaru choked out. Despite his panic, Subaru couldn't allow himself to stay quiet. It was just in his nature to keep talking when he shouldn't, and despite not wanting to converse with those who had wrong him, he forced himself to say, "W-What a joke. Even you know how quick Beatrice was to blasting me out of her sight back then."

"And you probably know by now how quick she was to accuse me of being a cultist." Subaru finished as he glared at Beatrice. His spite had started to overshadow his fight.

Upon hearing those words laced with venom, Beatrice felt unbearable guilt constricting around her heart as she desperately spoke to him, "Subaru, I'm so… I mean, to me, you're…"

Her words starting to fail her, Beatrice felt tears forming in her eyes and she earnestly pleaded "Please just please stay right there, I suppose! Don't go anywhere I can't reach you!"

In response to the Great Spirit's pleas, Subaru shouted back with even more intensity, "If you feel that way, then why were you the one that left me behind?!"

As if trying to prevent her heart from splitting, Beatrice pressed her hand tightly against her chest. Her breathing became strained from trying to contain her sobs.

"It's okay, Beatrice. I'll take it from here."

As the little girl loudly wept, a gentle voice comforted her. Once her legs gave out, the prideful Great Spirit collapsed to the ground in agony as her sobs rang out.

In Beatrice's place stood Emilia as she attentively gazed at Subaru.

"Emilia." Subaru uttered her name as if it were a curse.

As Emilia continued to gaze at him, Subaru thought to himself, "_Don't… look at me like that._"

"Subaru." Emilia spoke his name with such tender affection.

"_Don't look at me with such obvious pity in your eyes!_" Subaru screamed internally as his expression exploded into fury.

Although not oblivious to the hostile glare she received from the boy, Emilia gently urged, "Subaru, let's talk, okay?"

"'Talk'? About what?" Subaru quietly replied as his anger simmered. When he didn't receive an immediate response, Subaru took the initiative, "Let me guess. 'I'm sorry' and 'please forgive me'. That sums up what you all wanted to say to me, isn't it? Just an admission of guilt?"

"No, that's not what we want to say." Emilia refuted with a small shake of her head.

Somehow taking delight in her response, Subaru smirked as he condemned the girls, "Huh? So, you're not sorry for stabbing me in the back? For condemning me and putting me through all that hell?"

As she received the boy's hate-filled words, Emilia's lips trembled ever so slightly as she asked, "Subaru, what can I say… What can I do to make it up to you?"

"How the hell should I know? Why don't you return the favor and save me for once?" Subaru spat back.

Despite her calm demeanor, Emilia didn't know which words would save Subaru. She had all that time during the travel here, and yet there she stood with her thoughts in a mess. Subaru had saved her life and her heart many times before, and yet Emilia didn't even know how to reach his heart in return.

And so, Emilia decided to speak from her own heart.

"…I've been so lonely without you, Subaru." Emilia spoke in a pained voice barely louder than a whisper. With a hand to her chest, the half-elf continued to describe her pain, "I didn't even realize it until we defeated Gluttony, but I've missed you dearly all this time. Even with Beatrice at my side and making all these wonderful friends, it felt like I was missing a piece of myself."

"…The most important piece." Emilia tenderly spoke as a blush rose to her cheeks.

Subaru had heard similar words of loneliness spoken so sweetly by the half-elf before.

"…Stop it." Subaru muttered as he recalled the time when Emilia first confessed to him.

As if not hearing the boy's feeble plea, Emilia apologized, "I'm sorry for taking you for granted, but now that I remember you, I can't go on without you. So, let's always stay together from now on, because the time we spent apart was painful."

As she felt a fiery passion swirl within her chest, Emilia earnestly continued, "It was far too painful… but it's made me realize how much I care for you."

Startled by the obsessed look in the half-elf's eyes, Rem timidly tried to stop her, "Lady Emilia, that's—"

Only listening to the desire of her own heart, Emilia finished, "It's made me realize… that I really do love you, Subaru."

"Cut the bullshit! Even I know I'm just a replacement for Puck!" Subaru roared back. The half-elf's feelings couldn't be genuine. Not this easily. It felt just like the last time she confessed.

"_Loveyouloveyouloveyouloveyouloveyouloveme_."

As Subaru recalled the witch's incessant chants from long ago, he decided to say the worst possible insult to the person it would hurt the most, "Dumping your 'love' onto someone else just to get what you want! You're no better than the Witch of Envy!"

In response to the boy's words packed to the brim with hate, Emilia stared at him with disbelief with her mouth agape. It didn't take long for tears to form in her eyes or for her lips to quiver.

Throughout all that time fighting the prejudices against her, Emilia had never been devastated like this as she crumbled to the ground. Her heart lay there in unsalvageable pieces as she tried in vain to muffle her sobs with her hand.

Shocked by the brutality of his words, Rem pleaded, "Subaru, please apologize to Lady Emilia! Even if you are furious with us, you must understand how cruel it is to say something like that to her!"

"Don't bother, Rem. If words could reach him, he would have surrendered himself to you from the start."

Once Ram came into view, she turned to give Subaru a gaze of disgust as she berated him, "To think you would become this depraved. I didn't think anyone could stoop lower than the absolute bottom, Barusu."

With another obstacle appearing right before him, Subaru hissed, "Where the hell do you guys keep coming from? Is Otto or Garfiel next or something?"

"How dull of you to be unaware of my presence when I'm not even trying to conceal myself." Ram scolded the boy. In truth, Ram had there the entire time and merely stood by to see if Subaru could be brought back using affection.

Once Ram realized that was merely wishful thinking on her part, she spoke with her usual authority "I must say you're quite lucky. Making Lady Emilia and Beatrice cry is one thing, but if you made my little sister cry then I couldn't guarantee your safety in my presence."

Before she resorted to drastic measures, Ram gave her little sister one last opportunity, "It's true that Lady Emilia and Lady Beatrice have wronged you. Perhaps you would even like to lump me into that category with them. Still, Rem here is completely innocent, so at least listen to her."

"'Innocent'?" Subaru dangerously uttered. That single word caused Subaru to remember the first time he was betrayed in this world.

Once she decided to use the opportunity her sister presented for her, Rem gazed attentively at the boy and spoke, "Subaru, I can't even imagine what you've gone through during my absence."

"_Are you affiliated with the Witch's Cult?"_

As she recalled the promise they made, Rem felt tears forming in her eyes as she continued, "And I know that it's difficult for you right now as well, so instead… let's talk and laugh about the future together. Just like we promised, remember?"

"_Someone associated with the one who has caused my sister so much agony, boldly encroaching on the place we call ours."_

With her arms opened wide to accept the boy, Rem fervently spoke, "Even if time has come to a halt for you, I'll help make it start moving again and again. I'll be there to help you get back on your feet as many times as it takes!"

"_Even if I know my sister is only acting friendly and pretending to care for you!"_

With full faith that her hero would return, Rem pleaded with tears streaming down her face, "So please go back to being Rem's hero—!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

But that faith betrayed Rem when she received a madman's laughter in return.

With everyone speechless by his fit of laughter, Subaru smiled as he recalled, "That's right, how could I forget?"

His finger pointed accusingly at the blue-haired maid, Subaru smirked, "Rem, weren't you the first person to think I was in the Witch's Cult?! Didn't you come so close to taking my own life?!"

In response to the accusation, Rem merely went silent as her lips trembled. Her hopeful tears were on the verge of turning into sobs.

As he recounted his pain, Subaru realized, "_That's right. Emilia lied to me when we first met. Ram tried to kill me when Rem died. Beatrice thought I was a cultist, and now I remember that Rem thought I was one too._"

Once he noticed that Ram was getting closer to taking action, Subaru boldly smiled at the girls, "So, you all wanted to talk, huh?"

"_This is bad. I know I shouldn't do this._"

Somehow feeling euphoric, Subaru turned to the little girl and asked, "Well then, how about I start things off by asking a question. Beatrice, why did you think I was a part of the Witch's Cult?"

"_But just a little bit…_"

Having collected herself to the point of being able to speak, Beatrice finally stood up as she timidly explained, "Because… The attack of the Witch's Cult had just come to an end, so I assumed they'd pull one last stunt while things started settling down. I s-suspected you because you have the Witch's smell and you were a stranger trying to get too close to Emilia, I suppose."

His arms crossed over his chest, Subaru nodded in agreement as she continued to press her, "Mhm, sounds good enough, but let me guess, there was one thing you left out that completely incriminated me. Something that I could never explain myself out of."

"_Let me hurt you all just a little bit. It's only fair."_

Besides the clothes on his back, this was the only thing Subaru had managed to keep on his person, mostly because no one else even wanted to touch it.

Having anticipated Subaru's next words, Beatrice desperately yelled, "D-Don't say it, I suppose!"

"My gospel." Subaru nonchalantly spoke as he revealed the black book to them.

"…Subaru, what… is that?" Emilia was the first one to reply as she stared at the book in disbelief.

As he gave the book a small shake, Subaru impatiently repeated, "Huh? Are you deaf or something? I just said this was my gospel."

With her thoughts in a complete disarray, Emilia dumbfoundedly replied, "I heard you, but… I thought only people in the Witch's Cult had gospels."

Subaru's lips curved into a dangerous smile at Emilia's words as he asked her, "Then what does that make me?"

Once Emilia and the others became too terrified to answer, Subaru spread his arms out wide and asked, "So, you know how the Archbishops have their Authorities. Do you wanna see mine?!"

"Subaru!" Rem pleadingly screamed out.

At the same time as her little sister's scream, Ram followed her intuition as she charged at Subaru by using her wind magic to propel herself towards him.

Before Ram could reach the book, Subaru spread out his arms and triumphantly yelled "Invisible…! No, Unseen Hand!"

Not one, but four separate Unseen Hands had protruded out of Subaru's gut at his command. Ram was the first one to be caught by the invisible force with the other three girls quickly following suit.

As the four girls were being suffocated in front of him, Subaru suddenly realized, "Oh, I guess you guys wouldn't be able to see it anyways."

Subaru was once again surprised by his own calmness. Despite his newfound hatred, he knew that he had loved these girls once upon a time, so shouldn't he be feeling something from hurting them like this?

…Yes, he did feel something as a fire danced within his chest. As his lips curved into a joyous smile, Subaru realized he had finally sunken into the pits of depravity.

"Su…ba…"

While Rem called out his name using the remaining air left to her, Subaru nonchalantly realized "That's right, this happened to you once before, Rem, but you wouldn't remember it."

As he turned his gaze to Ram, he noticed the deathly glare he received from her. There was no doubt that Ram would claim his life if she had the chance. Even as she tried to steady her hand, Subaru didn't feel any sense of urgency. If she unleashed her wind magic and killed him right here, that would just be adding to the long list of their crimes against him.

"Fu…" Ram uttered a chant; however, the spell remained unfinished as her arm went limp.

As the four girls lost consciousness one by one, Subaru celebrated, "This is my chance! This time, I can finally be the one who kills them!"

And yet, right as he spoke those words, the shadowy arms hold on the girls' necks started to slacken by his own will.

With a smile completely devoid of emotion, Subaru felt empty tears forming in his eyes as he hollowly spoke, "Ah, that's right. How could I have forgotten—"

At the last possible moment, Subaru relented as the shadowy hands released their hold on the four unconscious girls. As he carefully laid the girls down on the ground, Subaru finally remembered, "—That I really do love them."

Even though he came terrifying close to ending their lives, Subaru still felt that monstrous drive to keep going. Fearing he would do something he could never take back, even after a restart, Subaru drew one of his Unseen Hands towards his own neck.

"_This… is the worst."_ Subaru thought to himself as he realized he had a chance at retaking his previous happiness, and yet he threw it away in the hope of relieving some of the frustrations that he had accumulated from all of his previous deaths.

The shadowy hand that was supposed to suffocate him merely caressed his cheek in defiance. Subaru felt disgusted with himself when he felt comforted by the touch, "Maybe… I really am Sloth now."

"Su…baru…" A frail voice called his name.

Subaru's eyes widened in disbelief as he realized who that voice belonged to. As he turned his head, Subaru saw the little girl slowly rise up from the ground.

"Beatrice." Subaru uttered her name. For the first time in so long, Subaru felt the desire to embrace another, but something was wrong.

It wasn't just the Unseen Hands that were disobeying him. Although he attempted to run over to the little girl and beg her for forgiveness, his legs didn't move. That same moment, Subaru finally realized that the part of him that made him Subaru was disappearing. It had been fading for quite some time, and now there were only traces of himself left, and _something _was meant to replace him.

With his mouth being the only part of himself that he retained some control over, Subaru gazed gently at the Great Spirit as he calmly spoke, "I'm sorry, Beatrice, but this is it for me."

"_So before I vanish without a trace…_"

"Please kill me." Subaru requested as he felt his conscious slowly start to crumble away.

"…I understand, I suppose." Beatrice hollowly spoke. Despite the raging emotions that stormed around in her heart, she recognized what was happening to Subaru. It was something she witnessed with the previous owner of that gospel.

At the Great Spirit's confirmation, the shadowy hands that enveloped Subaru shifted their aim towards the little girl as if they comprehended her intentions.

Right before the Unseen Hands took action, Subaru tried desperately to warn her "Beako, watch out!"

Despite the attack being invisible, Subaru's warning wasn't in vain as Beatrice aimed her hand and chanted, "El Minya!"

As he feared having to witness the sight of Beatrice getting ripped to shreds, Subaru tightly closed his eyes. Even as he felt the intense shockwaves and heard the earsplitting destruction all around him, Subaru kept his eyes closed. He prayed that a warmer scene would await him when he opened them back up.

"It's just as I remember. You really are the most huggable person, I suppose."

As he felt a thin pair of arms wrap around his waist, Subaru opened his eyes and was greeted by the destruction around him as he uttered, "Huh?"

Subaru thought there could be only two conclusions: his death or Beatrice's, and yet he was presented with a situation in which they were both alive. At least for the moment.

The wall behind him had been completely ravaged by Beatrice's intense magic. Since she knew the attack was invisible, the Great Spirit simply decided to obliterate everything surrounding Subaru while taking care not to injure him as well.

"Beatrice…" Subaru uttered her name. Even if she had destroyed the Unseen Hands, Subaru still felt something festering from inside him.

With her face pressed against his chest, Beatrice tearfully spoke, "I know you are too far gone. I'm merely buying just a little bit of time, I suppose. It's quite ironic. For most of my life, I had more time than I cared to have. I even wanted to discard all that time, and yet… Right now, all the time in the world wouldn't be enough to satisfy me. Nothing short of forever would suffice."

"I… I wanted to spend more time with you, Subaru." Beatrice choked out, her voice broken.

Subaru didn't know whether it was because the Unseen Hands had been blown away or he managed to summon strength he didn't know he still had, but he was able to move one of his arms just enough so that he could rest his hand atop Beatrice's head.

As he weakly yet lovingly caressed the little girl's head, Subaru uttered an apology, "I'm sorry, Beako. For everything."

Overwhelmed by a warmth she hadn't enjoyed in so long, Beatrice once again felt tears forming in her eyes as she silently wept, "I-I'm sorry too, I suppose. I'm sorry that I did such an awful thing to you. I'm sorry I couldn't save you just like how you saved me, I suppose."

"Beatrice…?" Subaru questioned as his intuition flared up.

"And I'm sorry that I can no longer give you the chance to be vivid in my recollections, because…" Beatrice uttered her final apology. Once her lips curved into a radiant smile, she spoke with finality, "Betty doesn't want to be left behind anymore, I suppose."

As it turns out, Beatrice didn't launch all of the magical stakes she previous summoned. Finally aware of the stationary magical stakes pointed at the two of them, Subaru pleaded, "Beako, don't—!"

Even as tears continued to spill out from her eyes, Beatrice gazed up into Subaru's face and confessed, "I love you, I suppose."

In unison, the remaining magical stakes were sent hurdling towards Subaru. Due to Beatrice's overpowering, precise, and swift magic Subaru couldn't even feel the pain as he seemed to die instantly; however, he still wasn't spared the sight of Beatrice getting impaled along with him.

* * *

"BEAKO!" Subaru screamed; however, the person who was calling for was no longer there. In fact, his surroundings had completely changed which caused him to question, "H-Huh? Where am I…?"

Once he quickly recalled these white walls and iron bars, Subaru slowly uttered, "I came back… all the way to this place?"

Usually, Subaru's checkpoint would take him back only a couple of days prior to his death. While it only felt like a few days ago since he's been locked up, Subaru was still able to rationalize that at least a few weeks had to have passed for Beatrice and everyone to arrive in Priestella.

But Return by Death had always been a mystery to him, and right now he had more important thoughts.

Confused by the tears that formed in his eyes, Subaru shouted, "Beatrice… God dammit, Beatrice! Why would you do something so stupid?! It's not like you come back if you…! Even after I did all of that, why would you die for someone like—"

"_I love you, I suppose._"

Once he recalled her confession, the answers to all of his questions became obvious. No, they were obvious from the start, but somewhere along the way he had forgotten.

Subaru had forgotten that he was truly and selflessly loved.

"AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!" Subaru screamed out in agony once he had realized all of the sins that he had committed. He remembered that the pain on their faces and the tears they shed was solely his fault.

And the blood that had been spilled was also his fault.

After screaming and cursing himself for what seemed like an eternity, Subaru strained his hoarse voice to receive an earnest plea, "I promise I'll do it right this time, so please…"

"Let's just back to how things were."

* * *

**Author's Notes: ****IT LIVES!**

**Hey, I'm not dead! But I did say screw it for a while there.**

**How it do fellas. How you been doing? You been staying out of trouble? Did you get into that nice school you wanted? Have you been brushing your teeth? **

**After a long and unexplained ten-month hiatus, I'm back! Strangely enough, this wasn't my longest hiatus on this site. I remember taking a one-year+ break from that Raku x Chitoge fic.**

**Okay, so why did this take so long to come out?**

…

**I don't think I can get away with saying "I forgot about this fanfic lol". Anyways, the simple answer is that I didn't feel like writing and wanted to do other things. Writing fanfics is a huge time sink for me, so I decided to take a break and catch up on a bunch of stuff that I had been putting off. Granted, I didn't think I would be gone for almost a year, but that's just how it went this time.**

**Also, apparently, I was gone for so long that someone else continued this fanfic? I think that was my wake-up call that I had been putting this off for too long lol. If you want to read about an alternative route that takes place after the first chapter, read "The Broken Child" by MightBeADuck.**

**The hardest part about writing this chapter was that Subaru wasn't really Subaru, you know? Writing about Subaru is so light-hearted and fun for me, so writing him like this hurts. **

**I also feel that I wasn't fully able to squeeze out all the potential from what I set up in the first chapter. I guess that also was a factor in why I was gone for so long. This is going to be a three-chapter story with maybe an additional fourth chapter. That sounds weird, but basically, the fourth chapter is an alternative ending to chapter three, but I'm actually calling it the true ending because I like it more. Gah, that probably sounds so confusing!**

**Been really addicted to Granblue Fantasy lately. Really do love the game, but I wish knew all the pro tips before I started, like "Pro tip #1, Don't play Granblue Fantasy". That's one of the places where a bunch of my time has gone. That and Runescape. **

**Can't wait for the next Re:Zero episode on Wednesday, but if you're a light/web novel reader like you should be, then you probably already know what it's going to be about. BUT THAT'S WHY I'M EXCITED!**

**Well, I think that's about it for now. Hopefully I don't take another ten months to update, and I'll see you… in the next one.**

**Cheers!**


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